


Roseate

by antioedipus



Category: Naruto
Genre: F/M, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:48:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,625
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24259930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antioedipus/pseuds/antioedipus
Summary: The truth will make you sad.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura/Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura/Uzumaki Naruto, Hyuuga Hinata/Uchiha Sasuke
Kudos: 22





	Roseate

You know those relationships that you get into when you want everything to fall into place _so badly_ , because life has been so goddamn _unfair_ , and for the first few months, it feels like everything is falling into place?

It started in such a small, insignificant way. Sasuke comes to her on a Thursday evening. She is on her bed, rereading a her beat up copy of Marguerite Duras’ _The Lover_. Each time she reads the novel, she underlines “very early in my life it was too late”. She has just underlined it for the fiftieth time, when she hears a gentle tap-tap at her window. She looks up, seeing Sasuke giving her a small wave. He isn’t smiling, but his eyes are bright. He holds a finger to his lips, asking her to stay quiet. The sun is golden, and as it sets behind him, the pale young man looks apricot, wrapped in soft peach-pink light. Sakura gets up and opens her window, and Sasuke climbs in. Wordlessly, he holds up a small joint, a small offering.

This isn’t the first time they have done this. Usually Naruto and Sai would be with him, and the three boys would sneak in so they could all watch a movie, with Sakura’s mother’s cooking at their disposal. The boys always insist on remaining silent until Sakura turns on the movie. She has never had the heart to tell them that her mom always knows, and makes sure to have lots of snacks on hand.

Acting like he has never been here before, Sasuke sheepishly climbs onto her bed. Sakura, rolling her eyes, turns to light some incense and open her window. She then puts a towel at the bottom of her door, before throwing her computer at Sasuke, to get him to play some music. She is working on her English. He knows because it is what Hinata was working on right before she told him that it was over. Sasuke, in a mood, scans the list. He remembers Hinata making an offhand remark about Sakura’s taste in music: that is sounds like various shades of the colour pink. The pastels are bubble gum sweet, and the dusty tints are the heady love songs. Hinata said that Sakura’s favourites, were the magentas: energetic and strong, the kind of music you can dance to. The memory feels bitter, so he blinks to himself, shoving it all back. Not wanting to think of Hinata, he clicks on the first unfamiliar name.

He hears the drums, and a soft guitar, and a soft voice begins to chime. _L.A on my mind_. Sakura begins to bop her head, muttering the lyrics under her breath. She is back up on her feet—she sparks up the lighter to light the joint between her lips. She turns to her bed, walking up to offer the joint to Sasuke. He is looking at her strangely.

“What is a summer girl?” he asks, the words sounding clumsy on his tongue. Sakura tilts her head, trying to figure out what he is saying.

“Excuse me?”

“You know, a summer girl!” Sasuke pouts. He hates when he doesn’t know something, and that is especially true when it comes to words. English is a lazy language, and non-native speakers, like Sasuke, are always too delicate with it.

“Oh, a summer girl? Well, let me see.” She plops down next to him, putting her index finger to her chin. “Well, in parts of North America, the summer gets really hot, while the winters are very cold. So, in the summer, everyone wears fewer clothes—think, a lot of diaphanous layers, and bright colours and patterns. It’s warmer, so everyone is outside, at all hours, because the season is so brief. So, I guess the best way to sum up a summer girl is that she is the kind of girl you start dating in the summer, but like, only for the summer. The whole relationship has a shelf-life, but that almost makes it more beautiful.” Beside her, Sasuke snorts, passing the joint back to her.

“So, she’s someone you don’t date long term. And she likes that?” Sakura takes another puff, and rolls her eyes.

“Is it really that bad? To be in a relationship that you know won’t last?”

Sasuke screws up his face, the pot beginning to make everything feel hazy. He can see that Sakura is feeling it too, as she puts out the joint and tucks it into the tin on her nightstand.

“Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad.” Sasuke lies back on her bed, and he can smell her hair. Their bodies feel heavy but light, and he moves to the side so Sakura and lie down next to him. He wraps his arm around her shoulders, as her head is on his chest.

They both know and don’t know why they are falling together this way. Sakura once had an annoying crush on him, but that is not why either of them are here. Sasuke rubs the tip of the wing of her collarbone, while Sakura sighs. She puts her nose right into his neck, breathing gently onto his skin. She doesn’t want to think about the mark, which she knows is still here. She gets up on her elbow, so her head hovers above his own.

What she is about to ask makes sense in her head. They are here, together, and the music around them is like a dusty pink rose, and they are in the centre of the bloom. Yes, the silk petals are closing on them, soft and warm and hazy.

She opens her mouth to ask him a question, but he leans up too fast, kissing her. She sighs, pulling away. He grunts, opening his eyes so that she can look right into them. They look like volcanic glass, black and shiny. She strokes his cheek with the pad of her thumb, and he just looks so beautiful. She can’t stop herself from kissing him again, because he is so cute when he is flushed. She kisses him again, so he knows that she loves him. Their fourth kiss, is so that she knows he feels the same.

The rest of the evening is spent figuring out how they fit together. It’s all honey between them, sweet and floral and amber. She is amazed to find out that Naruto isn’t the only one who can make her pulse race; that she may get more than one great love. Sasuke traces the gentle snake of Sakura’s side. She is slim and muscled, and it’s entirely different to feel how her body moves against him as opposed to seeing it in battle.

It is midnight when he gets up, and he returns her glassy stare with his own. He doesn’t say good bye, because he never says that to anyone on Team Seven. He steals out the window, and she hears him thud onto the grass. The incense has long burnt out, and Sakura is cold with the window open and Sasuke gone.

They chase the high of that night for the rest of their relationship. Sasuke and Sakura both try so hard to love each other the right way. Sasuke is so certain of his future, and by comparison, Sakura feels like she is flailing. He helps her study for her medical exams, when she and Hinata stop speaking. He gets to practice some techniques with her, after his big fight with Naruto. He doesn’t even get jealous when she helps their stubborn team mate. They chose each other in the end, didn’t they?

Sasuke misses Hinata, and to his increasing panic, he realizes those feelings aren’t fading. In fact, as time passes, he just starts comparing the two girls even more. He doesn’t mean to, and he tries to stop. He wants to convince himself that they have always loved each other, and that they are trying to make things right between them.

But when he sees Hinata, he remembers the way she would hold his hand and walk ahead of him, like she was protecting him. When it first started happening, he thought Hinata was crazy, until he began to relax around her. He wasn’t tense, or looking over his shoulder anymore, for his twisted brother or that freak Orochimaru. Hinata showed him what it meant to be a true protector: she gave him peace. Now, Sakura wants that from him, but she doesn’t know it and Sasuke doesn’t know how to even begin to give it to her. So, they have reached a stalemate, even though they say “I love you”, like they really mean it even though they don’t, not in the way they are both desperate for.

Words are like magic, because they can build the world, but _I love you_ is one of the weakest incantations. Everyone says it to everyone they love; it is generic. Worst of all, what Sasuke and Sakura are soon to find out, is that it won’t be any truer if you say it a bunch of times. Rather, _I love you_ is the kind of spell that is cast in actions rather than words.

They don’t know this yet, but they soon will, as we all have to learn this difficult lesson. Sasuke, lying beside Sakura, three months since that roseate night in her room, looks at her. Lately, she just looks tired. Her forehead is always a little furrowed, even in sleep. He pokes it with the pad of his finger, before rolling over, away from her, to go to sleep.

The theory of private language—love, affect, make it possible, if but for a glimmer on a pond before disappearing into the abyss.

**Author's Note:**

> The song is "Summer Girl" by Haim


End file.
